MONDAY MEMOIRS - A Walk Down Memory Lane

I've been walking down memory lane today... cleaning out boxes in my basement. I'm trying to create a meaningful Christmas gift for my husband. He wants to "finish" the basement, and my stuff is standing in his way. So, I'm devoting hours every day for the next few weeks to cleaning out the big room that is full of my collection of hard-to-get-rid-of stuff.

Earlier today, I marched downstairs, garbage bags in hand, to start sifting through things. A few hours later, I found myself sitting in the middle of several boxes, going through Christmas cards from years gone by. I was deep in memories, and finding it hard to guide my hand to the garbage bag, even though these cards were too old to even matter anymore. The photos enclosed in the envelopes were of friends and family with young children - those children, like ours, are grown now. No reason to keep the old pictures. I stumbled on some hand written notes from my grandmother - now dead - and the sound of her voice, the touch of her hand, and the feelings I had whenever I was around her just flooded back.

Old puzzle pieces, check registers from 1995, handouts from classes taught, journal pages... so many memories. Needless to say, I didn't get much done. I did end up with 4 garbage bags full of things to be thrown away, and two large boxes of things to donate. However, the basement doesn't look much different - I only made it through about 2 square feet. And I'm beginning to realize that I've carved out quite a task for myself in the next two weeks.

I'll admit that it's nice to let things go - and it will be nice to have lots of room. But, memories are funny things - they get ahold of your heart, and won't let go. I remember at the end of my cancer journey - when my hair was growing in again, and I didn't need the scarves and wigs I had worn for so long... or the blanket that I took to each chemo treatment... or even the books of information that had been my companions for so long. I made a day of putting things away - of getting rid of that part of my life. The thing I realized then, and that I need to remember now, is that I'm getting rid of the "stuff", but not the memories. Those will stay with me forever.

I'm having a hard time working up the desire to head back downstairs. The thought of my husband's face when I take the blindfold off on Christmas morning, and show him the surprise - an empty room that he can work on - is incentive enough to get me back downstairs.

**If you'd like to add something to your cancer story, take a minute to write about the things you've "put away" from your fight with cancer. How did getting rid of those things make you feel?