One day while visiting my daughter, Teresa’s home, my eye caught a saying on her wall that had three powerful words, “Because nice matters.” I chuckled to myself because I could hear her in my mind saying to her children as only she could, “Be nice!” It was obviously important to her that her children learn this principle which at times seems to be sadly lacking in our society.
I then thought of a man who sought me out at the bank this week to apologize for his behavior in a situation which occurred about a month ago. I was impressed with his effort to correct his mistake and the courage it took for him to come see me when I couldn’t even remember what he had done in the first place! We visited pleasantly for a while, he left feeling better, and I felt that I had a new friend. In fact, he just came in and gave me a hug this afternoon!
In contrast to this experience I recalled another man who stormed into the bank about three weeks ago, pushed himself in front of a customer I was helping, and yelled, “Your bank’s ATM just shorted me $450!” I took a deep breath, told him I was with someone at the moment and that I would help him when I was free. The customer at my desk was a distinguished older gentleman who was weeping openly as he informed me of the Newtown shooting. This was the first I had heard of the tragedy and I am sure that my face looked horrified. "That is just the news,” the upset man chortled as he scowled at me. “This guy can wait. You need to take care of ME NOW!”
I found myself appalled at his behavior, yet I pitied him because obviously nobody ever taught him that “nice matters” or that his value system was sadly askew. Refusing to help him, I sought the assistance of my manager who attended to his needs, and had his money back to him within five minutes. In all honesty I was afraid of what I might of said because it may have cost me my job (and I would have been far from nice myself!)
Sue Patton Thoele has these words to say about being nice: “Nice not only wears well, but generally, it also fares well, for kindness is never out of date nor out of style and is welcome in all circles.” When I hear the awful news reports about the atrocities going on in the world, I sometimes wonder if many of us have forgotten what “nice” is all about. Perhaps we need a refresher course because nice DOES matter……it matters A LOT!
Kathy Christensen
Showing posts with label Kindness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Kindness. Show all posts
Friday, January 4, 2013
Monday, September 17, 2012
MONDAY MOTIVATION/THURSDAY THOUGHTS - Only One Purpose
I haven't shared Kathy's Thursday Thoughts for a few weeks, so I thought I'd post one here today. I thank her SO much for these words. There are days when I just need to hear that what we are doing is helping and making a difference - exactly what we set out to do. Kathy's next post will be on Thursday...
I love my job at the bank because I meet such fascinating people and they teach me so much. Randy is one of those people. He is probably in his mid forties. He is severely handicapped and mentally challenged. He is deaf and therefore has difficulty speaking, but he holds down a job and brings his deposits into the bank on a regular basis. Karen is a woman who has taken Randy under her wing. She told me one day, “I loved him the minute I met him.” She has learned sign language and she (along with her husband) brings him in to help him with his finances. I love to see them when they come in. There is no fanfare and no public recognition…just love and charity being displayed in its purest form.
Seeing them makes me think of the many people who have touched my life. Most are not public figures and they probably don’t have huge bank accounts or drive the biggest and best cars. But their hearts are full of genuine concern and love. Among these are the women in our organization Lifting Hearts. They are organized for only one purpose…to lend support and love to those who are suffering from the rigors of Breast Cancer. They are among the most noble women I know.
I was drawn to a song written by Alan Jackson about his father. The entire song was worth listening to, but the chorus catches the spirit I am trying to create in this week’s blog. It goes like this:
And he Bowed his head to Jesus
And he stood for Uncle Sam
And he only loved one woman
Was always proud of what he had
He said his finest contribution
Was the ones he left behind
Raised on the ways and gentle kindness
Of a small town southern man
Although I was not raised in the south, the chorus of this song resonated with me deeply even the first time I heard it, because I know so many unsung heroes like the one Jackson sang about. While our society seems to be fascinated with the lives of the rich and famous, I feel that perhaps equal or even more attention should be given to those who are noble and unknown, for they are the backbone of this nation. We also need to recognize that all of us have a circle of influence that is greater than we realize, and if we each invest ourselves in doing all we can to lighten the load for the people in our circle, the world becomes a more pleasant place for all of us. Although most of our lives do not play out on a public stage, we can add a great measure of joy to those we serve, just like Karen does for Randy, and the women of Lifting Hearts do for those who are progressing through their Breast Cancer journeys. There are endless opportunities to do this and I for one, plan to be more aware and a little less self absorbed so that I can bring at least a few more smiles to those within my circle.
Kathy Christensen
I love my job at the bank because I meet such fascinating people and they teach me so much. Randy is one of those people. He is probably in his mid forties. He is severely handicapped and mentally challenged. He is deaf and therefore has difficulty speaking, but he holds down a job and brings his deposits into the bank on a regular basis. Karen is a woman who has taken Randy under her wing. She told me one day, “I loved him the minute I met him.” She has learned sign language and she (along with her husband) brings him in to help him with his finances. I love to see them when they come in. There is no fanfare and no public recognition…just love and charity being displayed in its purest form.
Seeing them makes me think of the many people who have touched my life. Most are not public figures and they probably don’t have huge bank accounts or drive the biggest and best cars. But their hearts are full of genuine concern and love. Among these are the women in our organization Lifting Hearts. They are organized for only one purpose…to lend support and love to those who are suffering from the rigors of Breast Cancer. They are among the most noble women I know.
I was drawn to a song written by Alan Jackson about his father. The entire song was worth listening to, but the chorus catches the spirit I am trying to create in this week’s blog. It goes like this:
And he stood for Uncle Sam
And he only loved one woman
Was always proud of what he had
He said his finest contribution
Was the ones he left behind
Raised on the ways and gentle kindness
Of a small town southern man
Although I was not raised in the south, the chorus of this song resonated with me deeply even the first time I heard it, because I know so many unsung heroes like the one Jackson sang about. While our society seems to be fascinated with the lives of the rich and famous, I feel that perhaps equal or even more attention should be given to those who are noble and unknown, for they are the backbone of this nation. We also need to recognize that all of us have a circle of influence that is greater than we realize, and if we each invest ourselves in doing all we can to lighten the load for the people in our circle, the world becomes a more pleasant place for all of us. Although most of our lives do not play out on a public stage, we can add a great measure of joy to those we serve, just like Karen does for Randy, and the women of Lifting Hearts do for those who are progressing through their Breast Cancer journeys. There are endless opportunities to do this and I for one, plan to be more aware and a little less self absorbed so that I can bring at least a few more smiles to those within my circle.
Kathy Christensen
Thursday, August 2, 2012
THURSDAY THOUGHTS - Patience Please!
A few weeks ago I was driving home from work. While waiting for a red light to change, I noticed a piece of paper taped in the back window of the car in front of me that had a sign in hand written letters which read, “Learning to drive a stick shift….PATIENCE PLEASE!” I laughed almost out loud as I remembered my father taking me in to the fields west of Springville where there wasn’t much traffic, to master the same skill.
My thoughts then turned to the endless situations which require patience. Take for instance the messes of the preschool years when children seem to spill more than they eat, or the yearly fiasco of tangled Christmas lights. How about potty training, or entering the kitchen to find a dozen eggs cracked on the floor because my son loved the way they sounded as he dropped them?
It seems to me that there is a patience progression of sorts. Spilled milk and potty training give way to and prepare us for whatever challenges await us in the future. These are different for each of us and there are enough maladies for all of us to share. There is Cancer and its many faces; depression in its various forms; divorce and the displacement it causes on many levels; the challenge of caring for aging parents; or the grief of burying those we love to name just a few. In our family I have one daughter in law who is awaiting the birth of their first child through a hot and uncomfortable summer, while my other daughter in law just suffered her third miscarriage. Both of these young women are learning the principle of patience in a different way.
Charles Dickens, the famous author, once said, “No one is useless in this world who lightens the burden of it for anyone else.“ Situations which require patience provide more than ample opportunities for us to practice kindness. A wise man once wrote, “Kindness is the golden charm by which society is bound together.” I think patience and kindness go hand in hand and while being patient and kind to others is important, it is highly beneficial when we learn to be patient and kind to ourselves as well.
In our fast paced lifestyle, patience and kindness are at a premium. If you don’t believe it just watch how those around you react to someone cutting them off in traffic, or losing the last parking space in the lot to someone else. I recently saw the manager of a theater ask four people to leave because they were fighting over a seat. And how many of you have seen people fighting over Christmas gifts as the last shopping days slip away? “’Tis the Season” right? Perhaps “PATIENCE PLEASE” should be posted in windows everywhere. It might help us bind ourselves together with the golden charm of kindness as we progress on our life’s path.
Kathy Christensen
Survivor
Member, Lifting Hearts
My thoughts then turned to the endless situations which require patience. Take for instance the messes of the preschool years when children seem to spill more than they eat, or the yearly fiasco of tangled Christmas lights. How about potty training, or entering the kitchen to find a dozen eggs cracked on the floor because my son loved the way they sounded as he dropped them?
It seems to me that there is a patience progression of sorts. Spilled milk and potty training give way to and prepare us for whatever challenges await us in the future. These are different for each of us and there are enough maladies for all of us to share. There is Cancer and its many faces; depression in its various forms; divorce and the displacement it causes on many levels; the challenge of caring for aging parents; or the grief of burying those we love to name just a few. In our family I have one daughter in law who is awaiting the birth of their first child through a hot and uncomfortable summer, while my other daughter in law just suffered her third miscarriage. Both of these young women are learning the principle of patience in a different way.
Charles Dickens, the famous author, once said, “No one is useless in this world who lightens the burden of it for anyone else.“ Situations which require patience provide more than ample opportunities for us to practice kindness. A wise man once wrote, “Kindness is the golden charm by which society is bound together.” I think patience and kindness go hand in hand and while being patient and kind to others is important, it is highly beneficial when we learn to be patient and kind to ourselves as well.
In our fast paced lifestyle, patience and kindness are at a premium. If you don’t believe it just watch how those around you react to someone cutting them off in traffic, or losing the last parking space in the lot to someone else. I recently saw the manager of a theater ask four people to leave because they were fighting over a seat. And how many of you have seen people fighting over Christmas gifts as the last shopping days slip away? “’Tis the Season” right? Perhaps “PATIENCE PLEASE” should be posted in windows everywhere. It might help us bind ourselves together with the golden charm of kindness as we progress on our life’s path.
Kathy Christensen
Survivor
Member, Lifting Hearts
Thursday, November 3, 2011
THURSDAY THOUGHTS - Ease the Burden of Others
Guest Post:
One morning last week I was going through the motions of getting ready for work. You know shower, deciding what to wear, blowing my hair dry and putting on make up...the normal routine. While doing this, I happened to glance up at the framed quote on my wall..."You have to keep on keepin' on." It was my Grandma Belle's trademark quote while she was alive and it hangs proudly in all of our homes. This morning was different than most because many mornings it hangs there and I hardly notice it. This morning, however, it spoke to me in a most distinct way. I began to recall that it has been almost three years since my Cancer diagnosis and surgery. I remembered how the diagnosis came out of nowhere. It was a total and complete surprise as well as a definite wakeup call. Although I truly felt that everything would be OK, the experience was unsettling at best.
Of course I have a wonderful family and great friends who lent me support, but when I attended the first meeting of Lifting Hearts (formerly known as Sister Survivors)I became acquainted with many women going through the same experience. It gave me such a sense of belonging and also helped me gain a more heatlhy perspective of my entire cancer journey. There I found most positive women who had emerged through scenarios much worse than mine and done it with dignity and style. Meeting them helped me greatly in my own efforts to "keep on keepin' on."
Because I am a writer, I love reading the quotes and works of other writers. Charles Dickens once said,"No one is useless in this world who lightens the burden of it to anyone else." In a very real sense the women at Lifting Hearts helped to lighten my burden so I could see my situation through realistic eyes and ease some of the original panic I felt. I will always be grateful to them.
There are countless people around us who are struggling. It may be from a divorce, difficulties with children and their choices, health issues, loss of a loved one, or in this particular economic climate...financial stress. The most wonderful thing we can do in so many cases is try to ease the burden of others we meet with encouragement, love and support, just as Lifting Hearts has done for us.
I want to close with the following quote which is an inscription from a church in Upwaltham, England:
"I wish thee not riches, nor the glow of greatness, but wherever thou go some weary heart shall gladden at thy smile, or shadowed life know sunshine for a while. And so thy path shall be a track of light, like angel's footsteps passing through the night."
Kathy Christensen
Survivor
Member of Lifting Hearts
One morning last week I was going through the motions of getting ready for work. You know shower, deciding what to wear, blowing my hair dry and putting on make up...the normal routine. While doing this, I happened to glance up at the framed quote on my wall..."You have to keep on keepin' on." It was my Grandma Belle's trademark quote while she was alive and it hangs proudly in all of our homes. This morning was different than most because many mornings it hangs there and I hardly notice it. This morning, however, it spoke to me in a most distinct way. I began to recall that it has been almost three years since my Cancer diagnosis and surgery. I remembered how the diagnosis came out of nowhere. It was a total and complete surprise as well as a definite wakeup call. Although I truly felt that everything would be OK, the experience was unsettling at best.
Of course I have a wonderful family and great friends who lent me support, but when I attended the first meeting of Lifting Hearts (formerly known as Sister Survivors)I became acquainted with many women going through the same experience. It gave me such a sense of belonging and also helped me gain a more heatlhy perspective of my entire cancer journey. There I found most positive women who had emerged through scenarios much worse than mine and done it with dignity and style. Meeting them helped me greatly in my own efforts to "keep on keepin' on."
Because I am a writer, I love reading the quotes and works of other writers. Charles Dickens once said,"No one is useless in this world who lightens the burden of it to anyone else." In a very real sense the women at Lifting Hearts helped to lighten my burden so I could see my situation through realistic eyes and ease some of the original panic I felt. I will always be grateful to them.
There are countless people around us who are struggling. It may be from a divorce, difficulties with children and their choices, health issues, loss of a loved one, or in this particular economic climate...financial stress. The most wonderful thing we can do in so many cases is try to ease the burden of others we meet with encouragement, love and support, just as Lifting Hearts has done for us.
I want to close with the following quote which is an inscription from a church in Upwaltham, England:
"I wish thee not riches, nor the glow of greatness, but wherever thou go some weary heart shall gladden at thy smile, or shadowed life know sunshine for a while. And so thy path shall be a track of light, like angel's footsteps passing through the night."
Kathy Christensen
Survivor
Member of Lifting Hearts
Thursday, October 6, 2011
THURSDAY THOUGHTS - Be That Kind Of Friend
Guest post...
What would life be like without the friends we meet along our life's path? Having been blessed with many close friends during my lifetime, I truly can not imagine my life without them. Last week I received a call from a dear friend I had over twenty six years ago. We simply lost track of each other. I wondered about her and how she was doing many times, but had no idea how to reach her. Thank heavens she took the time and effort to track me down and surprised me with a phone call this week. The joy it brought me was almost beyond words to describe. I then thought of the many friends who have added so much sweetness, love and support to my life and my heart was filled with gratitude. Dinah Maria Mulock penned a quote that reads like this:
"Oh, the comfort , the inexpressible comfort, of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts, nor measure words--but pouring them all right out--just as they are--chaff and grain together--certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them--keep what is worth keeping--and with the breath of kindness blow the rest away."
Thank heavens for such friends. They make the rough patches in our lives better and the good times that much sweeter. I think this is the principle which drives Lifting Hearts to reach out to so many of us. They have made many of us feel more loved, safer, and simply grateful for their love, support and encouragement.
Henry B. Eyring once said that if we treat everyone we meet as if they were experiencing a period of crisis in their lives, we would be right more that half of the time. That means there are opportunities all around for us to BE that kind of a friend for someone else. Heaven help us all to strive to be more aware of others who may need love, support, or even just a smile from us. I will be forever grateful that my old friend took the time to find me. We vowed to NEVER lose track again, and I promised myself to be more aware of opportunities to share love and support with others as I continue my life's journey.
Kathy Christensen
Survivor
Member of Lifting Hearts
What would life be like without the friends we meet along our life's path? Having been blessed with many close friends during my lifetime, I truly can not imagine my life without them. Last week I received a call from a dear friend I had over twenty six years ago. We simply lost track of each other. I wondered about her and how she was doing many times, but had no idea how to reach her. Thank heavens she took the time and effort to track me down and surprised me with a phone call this week. The joy it brought me was almost beyond words to describe. I then thought of the many friends who have added so much sweetness, love and support to my life and my heart was filled with gratitude. Dinah Maria Mulock penned a quote that reads like this:
"Oh, the comfort , the inexpressible comfort, of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts, nor measure words--but pouring them all right out--just as they are--chaff and grain together--certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them--keep what is worth keeping--and with the breath of kindness blow the rest away."
Thank heavens for such friends. They make the rough patches in our lives better and the good times that much sweeter. I think this is the principle which drives Lifting Hearts to reach out to so many of us. They have made many of us feel more loved, safer, and simply grateful for their love, support and encouragement.
Henry B. Eyring once said that if we treat everyone we meet as if they were experiencing a period of crisis in their lives, we would be right more that half of the time. That means there are opportunities all around for us to BE that kind of a friend for someone else. Heaven help us all to strive to be more aware of others who may need love, support, or even just a smile from us. I will be forever grateful that my old friend took the time to find me. We vowed to NEVER lose track again, and I promised myself to be more aware of opportunities to share love and support with others as I continue my life's journey.
Kathy Christensen
Survivor
Member of Lifting Hearts
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