I have always been a spiritual person by nature. When I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer this area of my life became stronger than ever. Most times these feelings went much deeper than words, and though I journaled specific events, I found that in most cases that words were clumsy excuses for the feelings I experienced.
During this time the Fear Monster loomed close and "whatifitis" was in the air. What if the surgery doesn't get all of the Cancer? What if we don't have enough money? What if I can't work? What if I never get to meet my boys' children? I discovered that too much time to think made life less sweet. World news seemed so full of gloom and doom that it invaded my peace of mind and got in the way of my spiritual health. I began to crave time away from everything because I found the chatter and noise of the world to be exhausting. This was a tricky balance to achieve because I had to live in the world without letting it overwhelm me.
I found spiritual harmony was more readily available and likely to happen if I slowed down the pace of my life. By slowing down I was able to keep my heart and mind open to spiritual promptings. It enabled me to turn my heart loose and let it rule my mind; to depend on God and learn to deal with situations as they presented themselves; to quit dreaming up trouble. Since so much of the world is in turmoil, inner peace became much more important to me than ever before. I learned it cannot be bought...it must be earned. The only peace we have is within ourselves so it is expedient for us to keep our spiritual centers strong.
With my spiritual center steady and in place, I felt a calm assurance that I was progressing as I should. This connection gave me a quiet sense of peace and power. I was able to take the focus off of me and think of others. I found there was a great difference between the prayers I offered and the prayers I answered. I didn't have to look far to find people with all kinds of problems and challenges. A kind word, a hug, a plate of cookies or a note in the mail could lift someone's heart in a significant way.
I remembered many years ago telling my boys when they studied for upcoming tests at school to "pray as if it all depends on God but work as if it all depends on you." This strategy also worked for me at this time of my life as I worked to stay spiritually grounded. I learned that prayer plus spiritual guidance resulted in miracles and I tried to incorporate this winning equation in my life.
While learning to put this concept into play, I found that opportunities to help,were all around me when I was spiritually in tune, and though many of these miracles were small, they still had huge significance in the lives of those I encountered. Kind words, a smile, and genuine expressions of concern are never wasted. I began to realize over time that I will probably never be rich or famous, but if I can make my circle of influence a little sweeter to those around me by staying spiritually connected, I have not failed.
-Kathy Christensen
Showing posts with label Slowing Down. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Slowing Down. Show all posts
Saturday, June 22, 2013
Saturday, December 10, 2011
THURSDAY THOUGHTS - A Day To Be Alone With Myself
Well, I'm done recovering from our great Christmas party! I was SO happy to welcome all of you into my home. I hope everyone had a great time. It was nice to be able to visit with those who were able to come.
Because I was so busy getting ready for the party on Thursday, I skipped Kathy's Thursday Thoughts post. So, I thought I'd post it today. Enjoy...
Many years ago when I was a teenager and also in college, I used to go non stop like many of us do at that age. I only stopped when I went to bed and that is no lie. There were so many activities, so many friends, studies, work, and more extracurricular activities than I can list here. I remember thinking to myself that the more I got done, the better person I was. I even remember my youngest son saying to me one day, “Mom……you only stop when you’re asleep!”
I am happy to report that I have changed a lot since then. Although I stay plenty busy, I have stopped being a “human doing.” I have realized through the school of hard knocks that we need to take care of ourselves and getting enough rest and solitude is part of that equation. I remember on a few occasions scheduling a day off work just for me. I gathered a blanket, my favorite books, a journal, a bag lunch and of course a big Coke and headed for the mountains. I have a few favorite places when I take a day like this, where I can be totally alone by a creek so I can listen as it rustles by (one of the most soothing sounds imaginable). I have found these days to be most beneficial, especially to a person like me who tends to be hyper much of the time. I found that I was able to key down, reconnect with myself, clear my head and basically reconnect with the center of my soul……the part that gets squished into the background much too often. Sometimes I even fell into an incredibly restful sleep, which was therapeutic on many levels because at night, I sometimes have a difficult time getting my mind to quiet down enough to sleep.
A couple of weeks ago I saw a book entitled, “The World According to Mr. Rogers.” My mind immediately traveled back over 30 years to the time my first son watched “Mr. Rogers Neighborhood” each and every day. He would get his own little cardigan sweater and put it on just as Mr. Rogers did and each day I could hear him say to himself, “ I like you just the way you are,” a fitting message for each of us to learn and apply to our own lives. While remembering these happy memories from long ago, I purchased the book, took it home and began reading its many messages; Words of advice from a man who has influenced millions of children around the world. You can imagine my surprise and delight when found the following quote: “ It is important to know when we need to stop, reflect, and receive. In our competitive world, that might be called a waste of time. I’ve learned that those times can be the preamble to periods of enormous growth. Recently, I declared a day to be alone with myself. I took a long drive and played a tape. When I got to the mountains, I read and prayed and listened and slept. In fact, I can’t remember having a calmer sleep in a long time. The next day I went back to work and did more than I usually get done in three days.”
This message resonated with me in such a powerful way and I realized that maybe this change in my behavior is not appearing now simply because I am getting older. It is happening because I am getting wiser. Yesterday I told my youngest son to take some quality time to himself each and every day because it is healthy and pays great dividends. He gave me a simple answer, “Mother…..that is why I run.” I guess we all do it in our own way, but it is well worth the effort to create that habit and stick to it. Mr. Rogers has never guided anyone on a wrong course yet!
Kathy Christensen
Survivor
Guest Blogger
Member of Lifting Hearts
Because I was so busy getting ready for the party on Thursday, I skipped Kathy's Thursday Thoughts post. So, I thought I'd post it today. Enjoy...
Many years ago when I was a teenager and also in college, I used to go non stop like many of us do at that age. I only stopped when I went to bed and that is no lie. There were so many activities, so many friends, studies, work, and more extracurricular activities than I can list here. I remember thinking to myself that the more I got done, the better person I was. I even remember my youngest son saying to me one day, “Mom……you only stop when you’re asleep!”
I am happy to report that I have changed a lot since then. Although I stay plenty busy, I have stopped being a “human doing.” I have realized through the school of hard knocks that we need to take care of ourselves and getting enough rest and solitude is part of that equation. I remember on a few occasions scheduling a day off work just for me. I gathered a blanket, my favorite books, a journal, a bag lunch and of course a big Coke and headed for the mountains. I have a few favorite places when I take a day like this, where I can be totally alone by a creek so I can listen as it rustles by (one of the most soothing sounds imaginable). I have found these days to be most beneficial, especially to a person like me who tends to be hyper much of the time. I found that I was able to key down, reconnect with myself, clear my head and basically reconnect with the center of my soul……the part that gets squished into the background much too often. Sometimes I even fell into an incredibly restful sleep, which was therapeutic on many levels because at night, I sometimes have a difficult time getting my mind to quiet down enough to sleep.
A couple of weeks ago I saw a book entitled, “The World According to Mr. Rogers.” My mind immediately traveled back over 30 years to the time my first son watched “Mr. Rogers Neighborhood” each and every day. He would get his own little cardigan sweater and put it on just as Mr. Rogers did and each day I could hear him say to himself, “ I like you just the way you are,” a fitting message for each of us to learn and apply to our own lives. While remembering these happy memories from long ago, I purchased the book, took it home and began reading its many messages; Words of advice from a man who has influenced millions of children around the world. You can imagine my surprise and delight when found the following quote: “ It is important to know when we need to stop, reflect, and receive. In our competitive world, that might be called a waste of time. I’ve learned that those times can be the preamble to periods of enormous growth. Recently, I declared a day to be alone with myself. I took a long drive and played a tape. When I got to the mountains, I read and prayed and listened and slept. In fact, I can’t remember having a calmer sleep in a long time. The next day I went back to work and did more than I usually get done in three days.”
This message resonated with me in such a powerful way and I realized that maybe this change in my behavior is not appearing now simply because I am getting older. It is happening because I am getting wiser. Yesterday I told my youngest son to take some quality time to himself each and every day because it is healthy and pays great dividends. He gave me a simple answer, “Mother…..that is why I run.” I guess we all do it in our own way, but it is well worth the effort to create that habit and stick to it. Mr. Rogers has never guided anyone on a wrong course yet!
Kathy Christensen
Survivor
Guest Blogger
Member of Lifting Hearts
Thursday, June 2, 2011
THURSDAY THOUGHTS - Stop, Take a Deep Breath, Slow Down, and Enjoy...
I have learned in my life that no matter what situation we are in, relaxed and calm is the best way to be. This is not natural state for me. In fact, I have to practice staying relaxed. I love Richard Carlson's thoughts on learning to stay centered. He says:
"Regardless of your specific concerns, or what issues you are currently being confronted with, learning to stay centered is bound to help you... A person who is centered is able to remain calm in the midst of crisis and is able to make wise, appropriate decisions on an ongoing basis. Being centered also keeps you from being bothered or annoyed by the little things and assists you in keeping your cool. The easiest way to learn to be centered is to keep you attention in the present moment as much as possible...
Generally speaking, if you are feeling stressed, your mind will be in one of two places--in the past or in the future. Being centered brings with it a feeling of calm and ease. When you can maintain a sense of well-being even in the midst of chaos, you'll discover that life is much easier to deal with and far more manageable than when your attention is scrambled and frantic. Rather than remembering the hard day you had yesterday, or anticipating the difficult day you are likely to have tomorrow, you'll be more able to make today the best it can possibly be."
I love these thoughts. I remember when I was much younger I was a helpless overachiever... I used to think that the more I got done the better person I was. I was truly a "human doing" more than a "human being." While I am not suggesting that all of us lay around and do nothing, I am suggesting that if we remain centered and calm while accomplishing our daily tasks, that we will get just as much done and be much happier. We will also be more aware of those around us and more able to lend a helping hand when needed. So stop, take a deep breath, slow down a bit and enjoy the beauty around you. I can promise that life will be much sweeter and less frantic if you do so.
Speaking of enjoying things, my grandchildren will be arriving soon to spend the weekend with us. I am planning to stay centered and focused on this wonderful opportunity to enjoy them and all the fun we are going to have just being together.
Kathy Christensen
Sister Survivor
Guest Blogger
"Regardless of your specific concerns, or what issues you are currently being confronted with, learning to stay centered is bound to help you... A person who is centered is able to remain calm in the midst of crisis and is able to make wise, appropriate decisions on an ongoing basis. Being centered also keeps you from being bothered or annoyed by the little things and assists you in keeping your cool. The easiest way to learn to be centered is to keep you attention in the present moment as much as possible...
Generally speaking, if you are feeling stressed, your mind will be in one of two places--in the past or in the future. Being centered brings with it a feeling of calm and ease. When you can maintain a sense of well-being even in the midst of chaos, you'll discover that life is much easier to deal with and far more manageable than when your attention is scrambled and frantic. Rather than remembering the hard day you had yesterday, or anticipating the difficult day you are likely to have tomorrow, you'll be more able to make today the best it can possibly be."
I love these thoughts. I remember when I was much younger I was a helpless overachiever... I used to think that the more I got done the better person I was. I was truly a "human doing" more than a "human being." While I am not suggesting that all of us lay around and do nothing, I am suggesting that if we remain centered and calm while accomplishing our daily tasks, that we will get just as much done and be much happier. We will also be more aware of those around us and more able to lend a helping hand when needed. So stop, take a deep breath, slow down a bit and enjoy the beauty around you. I can promise that life will be much sweeter and less frantic if you do so.
Speaking of enjoying things, my grandchildren will be arriving soon to spend the weekend with us. I am planning to stay centered and focused on this wonderful opportunity to enjoy them and all the fun we are going to have just being together.
Kathy Christensen
Sister Survivor
Guest Blogger
Thursday, February 24, 2011
THURSDAY THOUGHTS - Sit Still...
Because I am by nature a high strung person, I have found it helpful to try to slow down my pace a bit. It seems that I can get just as much done yet have a more peaceful outlook on life. One of my favoite authors, Richard Carlson, gives the following advice about "sitting still:"
"Sitting still gives you an opportunity to clear your mind and reflect, a chance for inspiration to arise....What sitting still does for us is give us a chance to break any negative momentum that has built up during the day, an opportunity to regroup and start over. As you sit still and your mind quiets down, it's often the case that an answer to a problem will pop up in your head, as though it came out of the blue. For some reason, the act of sitting still and quieting down has a calming effect on the nervous system that tends to bring forth wisdom and insight."
It seems that most of us progress through life at a frantic pace. When I was younger I used to think that the more I got done, the better person I was...no matter what the emotional cost was to me. Thinking back on this now, I realize how silly it was. I am much kinder to myself now. When I am tired, I rest; I don't schedule my activities so tightly together; There are times when I allow myself to "Just Be" for a while. I can honestly tell you that life is much sweeter. I am learning to take life in stride and "go with the flow."
So go ahead....give yourself a break....a little time to sit still, to think, to "Just Be".... take a breath and decompress a bit. I am sure that you, like me, will find this practice worth the effort and your family will notice a difference as well. It is a win-win proposition for everyone involved.
Kathy Christensen
Guest Blogger
"Sitting still gives you an opportunity to clear your mind and reflect, a chance for inspiration to arise....What sitting still does for us is give us a chance to break any negative momentum that has built up during the day, an opportunity to regroup and start over. As you sit still and your mind quiets down, it's often the case that an answer to a problem will pop up in your head, as though it came out of the blue. For some reason, the act of sitting still and quieting down has a calming effect on the nervous system that tends to bring forth wisdom and insight."
It seems that most of us progress through life at a frantic pace. When I was younger I used to think that the more I got done, the better person I was...no matter what the emotional cost was to me. Thinking back on this now, I realize how silly it was. I am much kinder to myself now. When I am tired, I rest; I don't schedule my activities so tightly together; There are times when I allow myself to "Just Be" for a while. I can honestly tell you that life is much sweeter. I am learning to take life in stride and "go with the flow."
So go ahead....give yourself a break....a little time to sit still, to think, to "Just Be".... take a breath and decompress a bit. I am sure that you, like me, will find this practice worth the effort and your family will notice a difference as well. It is a win-win proposition for everyone involved.
Kathy Christensen
Guest Blogger
Thursday, September 9, 2010
THURSDAY THOUGHTS - How Busy is TOO Busy?
I'm combining yesterday's Wordless Wednesday post with this one today, because I was just too darn busy to post anything yesterday. In fact, that's the subject of today's Thursday Thoughts...
Three years ago, I was a person who went about 150 miles an hour - I never rested, I said "yes" to everything, I was constantly busy. So much so, that my family and friends had started to bug me about slowing down. And then I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Cancer has a way of throwing up "Caution" signs, and "Stop" signs. And I did... STOP! I stopped working, cleaning, cooking, etc. And I started to focus on taking care of myself. Oh, it wasn't easy, believe me. Before cancer, Kara (me) too a backseat to EVERYTHING else. I felt kind of guilty, but I had to cut the stress completely out of my life so that I could focus on fighting the cancer, and healing. My husband and cute boys took over - they kept everything clean, they cooked, they took care of me. That went on for 1 1/2 years. When I started feeling better, I started doing a few things for other people. The better I felt, the more I did. And now, I find myself back in the same position I was 3 years ago. I'm so busy, I can hardly breath sometimes. Take the last 3 weeks, for instance: THIS IS ME RIGHT NOW...
Yep, this is the pink Wordless Wednesday - my hot pink cast. That's right, I had another surgery. But, did that stop me?! NO!!!! While hobbling around on this cast I've spent every spare moment helping my sister get ready for a children's charity sale - we've gone through and tagged over 2500 items! We have a non-profit charity foundation that we both run, and we just happen to be SUPER busy at the beginning of Fall and Spring. Today is the sale, and I'm stressing just a little bit because I can't help. Why? Well, today is also the day of our Sister Survivor's meeting and I'm supposed to hand out tickets to all of the wonderful women in our group tonight at the concert. Plus, I have to run around getting things ready for the Women's Expo this weekend. On top of that, I've got a sick child at home, who gets to have the wonderful experience of having a scope shoved down his throat today at the hospital! Not to mention, I work 3 days a week, and it's been mind-blowingly busy lately.
I'm not telling you this to show just how much I can do - because I know that probably most of you are exactly like me. Busy, busy, busy. My questions to you are: When do you say no? When is enough, enough? Why can't I learn to leave a little bit of time to take care of myself?!
One of our sweet Sister Survivors called and talked to me for a minute this morning, and before she hung up, she said "Thank you for everything you do. What you are doing is important". And, there's my answer right there... I do everything I'm doing because it's important. I promised myself that if and when I got better, I would spend some time helping others. It's important. Especially to me.
Yesterday, when I didn't make it home for dinner yet another night, my husband called me. In the course of our conversation, he asked me: "Why are you doing all of this?" It really made me stop and think. My first response was "It has to be done!" "If I don't do it, who will?!" When I finally shut my mouth enough to listen, he asked me again... "Why are you doing this?" And that's when it came to me - I don't do everything I do to get thanks, or feel important. I do it because it makes me happy, and I WANT to do it. I just need to carve out a little bit of time to take care of myself, and learn to budget the remaining time I have a little better.
Bottom line - I'm happy to be alive, and I'm going to make the most of it!
P.S. I get my cast off TODAY - HAPPY DAY!
-Kara
Three years ago, I was a person who went about 150 miles an hour - I never rested, I said "yes" to everything, I was constantly busy. So much so, that my family and friends had started to bug me about slowing down. And then I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Cancer has a way of throwing up "Caution" signs, and "Stop" signs. And I did... STOP! I stopped working, cleaning, cooking, etc. And I started to focus on taking care of myself. Oh, it wasn't easy, believe me. Before cancer, Kara (me) too a backseat to EVERYTHING else. I felt kind of guilty, but I had to cut the stress completely out of my life so that I could focus on fighting the cancer, and healing. My husband and cute boys took over - they kept everything clean, they cooked, they took care of me. That went on for 1 1/2 years. When I started feeling better, I started doing a few things for other people. The better I felt, the more I did. And now, I find myself back in the same position I was 3 years ago. I'm so busy, I can hardly breath sometimes. Take the last 3 weeks, for instance: THIS IS ME RIGHT NOW...
Yep, this is the pink Wordless Wednesday - my hot pink cast. That's right, I had another surgery. But, did that stop me?! NO!!!! While hobbling around on this cast I've spent every spare moment helping my sister get ready for a children's charity sale - we've gone through and tagged over 2500 items! We have a non-profit charity foundation that we both run, and we just happen to be SUPER busy at the beginning of Fall and Spring. Today is the sale, and I'm stressing just a little bit because I can't help. Why? Well, today is also the day of our Sister Survivor's meeting and I'm supposed to hand out tickets to all of the wonderful women in our group tonight at the concert. Plus, I have to run around getting things ready for the Women's Expo this weekend. On top of that, I've got a sick child at home, who gets to have the wonderful experience of having a scope shoved down his throat today at the hospital! Not to mention, I work 3 days a week, and it's been mind-blowingly busy lately.
I'm not telling you this to show just how much I can do - because I know that probably most of you are exactly like me. Busy, busy, busy. My questions to you are: When do you say no? When is enough, enough? Why can't I learn to leave a little bit of time to take care of myself?!
One of our sweet Sister Survivors called and talked to me for a minute this morning, and before she hung up, she said "Thank you for everything you do. What you are doing is important". And, there's my answer right there... I do everything I'm doing because it's important. I promised myself that if and when I got better, I would spend some time helping others. It's important. Especially to me.
Yesterday, when I didn't make it home for dinner yet another night, my husband called me. In the course of our conversation, he asked me: "Why are you doing all of this?" It really made me stop and think. My first response was "It has to be done!" "If I don't do it, who will?!" When I finally shut my mouth enough to listen, he asked me again... "Why are you doing this?" And that's when it came to me - I don't do everything I do to get thanks, or feel important. I do it because it makes me happy, and I WANT to do it. I just need to carve out a little bit of time to take care of myself, and learn to budget the remaining time I have a little better.
Bottom line - I'm happy to be alive, and I'm going to make the most of it!
P.S. I get my cast off TODAY - HAPPY DAY!
-Kara
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)