MONDAY MOTIVATION - The Road Less Traveled By

Sorry, my friends, for being so neglectful of this blog lately.  I even forgot to post Kathy's Thursday Thoughts last week!  I'm finding that planning and executing a huge event (our 5K) is taking a LOT of time and effort.  I get so busy that I forget some of the important things. :)

The other day, I was reading Robert Frost's poem - The Road Not Taken.  I've always loved that poem.  But, as I read it this time, I saw those last few lines in a different light...

"Two roads diverged in a wood, and I -

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

Four years ago, I was faced with two different roads - one went into the past , where I was healthy, and one went into the future - I was diagnosed with breast cancer.  I didn't really have a choice about taking that road - my life had veered off onto that road without a choice being involved.  I went down that road by necessity.   It's definitely a road less traveled by - only about 1 in 8 women will be faced with breast cancer in their lives.  A statistic that is a bit scary, but still - not every women will have to travel this road.

However... that last line - "that has made all the difference" - that's what resonated with me this time.  The road I took 4 years ago has made all the difference in my life.  Sure... some of the differences are obvious - my body is different, my mind is different, and my soul is different.  Some differences are hard to bear, but the biggest difference - the one where my life has taken on a whole new meaning... that's the difference that is the most important.

Without breast cancer, my children wouldn't have learned - first hand and early in life - the importance of service, and unconditional love from those around them.  Without breast cancer, I wouldn't have slowed down and learned to appreciate the simple things in life.  Without breast cancer, I would never have become involved in charity the way I have.  Without breast cancer, I wouldn't have had the privilege of helping this wonderful group.  Without breast cancer, I never would have met all of the beautiful, strong, courageous women who make up the membership of Lifting Hearts.

I CAN imagine my life with real boobs, fewer aches and pains, and more hair... but I CAN'T imagine my life without these opportunities - I never would have met RuthAnn, Colette, Bethanie, Beth, Diane, Kathy, Denise, Judy, and countless others who have touched my life, and made it better.

I took the road I was forced to take... and that made ALL the difference.  

MONDAY MOTIVATION - A Life Of Service

I read a quote recently by Martin Luther King Jr.  He stated "Everybody can be great... because anybody can serve... You only need a heart full of grace, a soul generated by love."

I love the first thing he said we need - a heart full of grace.  The dictionary defines "grace" as "elegance or beauty of form, manner, motion, or actions."  I believe our actions, when we serve unselfishly, are beautiful, just like the definition says.

I've taught my children many things over the years, but the one thing I feel most strongly about - and that I've hopefully instilled in them - is the important of service.  As our family learned during my cancer treatments... service is LOVE!  So many people helped and served and loved our family, and we want to give back as much as we are able.  Because it is in service that we find the greatest joy...

"I slept and dreamt that life was joy.  I awoke and saw that life was service.  I acted and behold, service was joy."  -Rabindranath Tagore

If you are a member of Lifting Hearts - you'll be happy to know that service is a big part of what we offer to survivors.  We believe the to heal completely, you need to move your focus from yourself to helping others.  We offer many service projects to survivors: making rice warming bags, chemo blankets, and pillows for patients who are going through surgery; the opportunity to become a mentor to someone who is just starting their cancer journey; and, of course, there are many openings in our leadership that will give you the opportunity to serve your fellow survivors.

If you want to help in any way... look in the Contact Us tab, and call one of the board members.  We would love to work with you.

“God does watch over us and does notice us, but it usually through someone else that he meets our needs.” -Spencer W. Kimball

MONDAY MOTIVATION - Take-Aways on Self Improvement

I just returned from attending a national leadership convention for my job - in Washington, DC!  I had a great time, and my mind was FILLED with such amazing stuff.  I wanted to share some of the things I learned with you.

The keynote speaker was Robin Sharma, an expert in Leadership development.  He was phenomenal!

A few of my "take-aways" that I thought might be beneficial to anyone and everyone:

"Small daily improvements lead to stunning results!"  I really believe this is true, whether the improvements happen in your relationships, your body, your mind, or your spiritual self.

"Leaders love education."  This is one of the things I've started to take to heart lately - I'm trying to spend time each day improving myself.  This just makes you a better person.

"Work like Picasso painted!"  Wow, what a visual thing.  I would expand this to say "LIVE like Picasso painted"!  Be the best at what you do!

"If people aren't calling you crazy and laughing at you every week, you aren't dreaming BIG enough!"  IF there was one really important thing I learned, this was it.  My dreams have to be WAY bigger than they are.  If I want to look good, I can do it.  If I want to feel better, it's possible.  If I want to make enough money to pay my house off - NO problem.  I just have to dream it, and then set about making it happen!

And finally...

"Make sure each day accounts for something."  During cancer, I sometimes wondered what I would do if I could have more "good" days.  I've been blessed with more days - I need to make each one the best day "so far", do important things, and make memories!

Have a great week!

MONDAY MOTIVATION - Generostiy and Gratitude

G.B. Stern said: "Silent gratitude isn't much use to anyone."  I can be silent no longer...

I've been gathering items for our Lifting Hearts yard sale (this coming Saturday - June 23rd), and I've been amazed and humbled, and extremely grateful for all of those who have donated items to us.  I was gone all day on Saturday, driving around to different yard sales, picking up leftover items to use at our yard sale, and when I got home, imagine my surprise when I walked into my basement and it was FULL - literally FULL - of items that people had delivered to my house.  There is really not one bit of space to even walk in!

This group is SO important to me, and I hope to other survivors as well.  We are running out of funds, and because it takes money to run a support group this large, I'm worried that unless we can raise more funds, we won't be able to offer this support group much longer.  That, in my opinion, would be tragic.

Apparently, many of you feel the same way - at least, your contributions witness to that.  Thank you SO MUCH for being so generous!

We are still taking in donations of items for the yard sale. Please contact me, and I'll tell you where to drop your items off: 801-360-4666.

*monetary donations are always welcome!

Love,
Kara

MONDAY MOTIVATION - Changes

It's been a busy week so far for me and my family - actually, it's been a busy year! I got a letter at the beginning of this week from my son Michael, who is serving an LDS religious mission in Mexico.  The subject of that letter was "Changes".  We've had a lot of changes in our lives over the past 4 months.  As these changes have occured, we've each shared those changes with Michael in our letters.

Some of those changes include:

Me losing over 50 pounds, and starting on the road to regaining my health after my cancer journey.

My husband deciding to lose weight in order to feel better (he doesn't have much to lose - maybe 10 pounds.  But even 10 pounds can make a huge difference in the way you feel).

My oldest son, Grant, looking into graduate schools, which will most likely take him far away from home.

My 3rd son, Alex, taking AP tests, and applying to colleges.  Alex graduating from high school.

My youngest son, Matthew, finally finishing Jr. High, and moving on to High School.

Both younger kids working on finishing up requirements for their Eagle Scout awards.

Me starting a business, coaching people to their healthy weight and better health.

Rick and I working on finishing our basement.

Buying a riding mower for our .75 acre lawn (after 11 years of using walking mowers).

Cleaning up the yard.

Our dog, Cocoa, recently starting to show many signs of aging rapidly.

These changes, and others, have apparently had a profound impact on the one person who isn't around to witness them - Michael.  And he had some thoughts to share with us about this subject.  I thought I'd post a few of those thoughts here:

"This last week and then these letters that I got from all of you have left me with an odd feeling. Things are changing a lot in everyone's lives. BUT! The one thing that won't change, will absolutely never change is the love that our Savior has for us. In all of your changes... in all parts of your lives... don't ever forget that."  Of course, because Michael is on a religious mission, the Savior is very much a huge presence in his life right now, and I appreciated the reminder that He should be a presence in mine as well.  As I went through my cancer journey, I saw many miracles wrought in my behalf.  Christ's presence was felt on a daily basis.  I need to feel that in my life again.

Michael then quoted a beautiful scripture from the bible to us:  "For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."  Romans 8:38-39

And finally... here is the advice Michael gives to each of his brothers (I hope sharing this spiritual stuff doesn't offend anyone.  There is one thing that keeps a "missionary mom" going - one thing that makes up for being away from her child for 2 years - and that one thing is letters like this one that Michael wrote. Being able to witness the change in him - from child to man - that makes it all worth it.  I was a missionary mom when I went through cancer 3.5 years ago - my oldest son, Grant, was serving in Japan for two years.  That was, to say the least... hard.)

"Alex, the most important thing throughout time and all eternity that you have power over right now is your worthiness and preparation for your mission. Let NOTHING come in the way. Let no decision in your life not be shaped by your need to serve the Lord."

"Matthew, do all you can to keep yourself clean in an increasingly filthy world. You're entering into a time into your life in which your faith and testimony will be tested more than it ever has before (that goes for you too Alex). Do all you can to obtain and strengthen that testimony."

"Grant... in all things remain faithful to your temple covenants and attend the temple OFTEN."

The tone of Michael's letter makes me wonder if there have been changes in his life recently, too.  What kinds of things are weighing him down?  What challenges does he face every day?  Whatever the challenges, I know Michael will find it within himself to overcome them... just like I did when challenged with cancer.

Richard Nixon once said: "Only if you've been in the deepest valley can you ever know how magnificent it is to be on the highest mountain."  Michael is finding this out - as he helps change lives for the better.  And I found this out - as I literally journeyed through the deepest valley.  As we both climb the highest mountain, we are learning how really magnificent the view is, thanks to our willingness to make positive changes, improve ourselves, and help others.

One more sweet thing from our missionary:  he ended his letter with this...

"Mom and Dad, I love you. I don't know where I would be or what I would be doing if I had not had the love and guidance of two righteous and loving parents. My patriarchal blessing states that, "like Nephi, you have been born of goodly parents". I would be able to testify of the reality of a patriarchal blessing were it only for that phrase that is found in mine."

*Sigh*  Life is SO good. :)

-Kara

MONDAY MOTIVATION - The Motivation of Gaining Health

I'm having a GREAT day!  Hope it's great for all of you as well.

A few weeks ago, I became a Health Coach for a wonderful company that has helped me to lose 48 pounds and 48 inches in the last 14.5 weeks.  Not only do I look WAY different, I FEEL wonderful!

Three and a half years ago, when I was diagnosed with cancer, and started treatments, I never thought I'd feel good again. In January, I felt like I was twice my age - it's been 3 years since I finished chemo, and I still felt awful - no energy, lots of fatigue, aching joints, etc.  I knew my weight was out of control, too.

(This is me in January of this year, on the left - YIKES!  I started this healthy eating program, and here I am, on the right, after about 13 weeks)

I did every single thing I could to get rid of my breast cancer - I had all of the treatments my doctor lined up for me.  And now, I feel like I've taken the final step to regaining my health.  And, if my cancer ever comes back, it isn't going to be because I'm not healthy.

So, earlier today, I was reading in the Habits of Health book that I got with the program I'm on, and something I read really made a lot of sense to me:

Most changes we try to adopt (like dieting) are based on solving a problem or trying to get rid of an unwanted situation.  This type of motivation almost never leads to lasting changes.  You make changes at first, but later you fall back into your old ways of behavior.  So, for instance:  think about your health problems... you might hate the way you look or feel, and your natural response is to feel terrible about it.  In order to end that feeling, you take actions that make you feel better - you go on a diet, or you exercise.  But those actions aren't motivated by what you want (just by what you don't want), so they lead you into a predictable cycle... you act, and then because you've acted, you feel better - even if the situation hasn't changed much.  Feeling better takes the pressure off, lessening the bad feelings.  Less emotional conflict means there's less reason to continue doing the things that reduced the conflict in the first place.  Since you feel better, you no longer feel a pressing need to follow through on your actions.  And the original behavior returns.  That's what we call a "yo-yo pattern".  Conflict-driven motivation in one of the major reasons people yo-yo.  So, we need to change the way we're motivated...

We need to motivate ourselves by focusing on what we want - not what we don't want!  This is the difference between a problem-oriented motivation and an outcome-oriented motivation.  Changing our emphasis from what we're against to what we're for has a dramatic impact.

I found this fascinating.  If I'm understanding this right - what I need to do is change my motivation from thinking that I don't want to be unhealthy, to thinking that I want optimal health.  Instead of trying to lose weight, I need to focus on gaining health!  I love this idea!  If I focus on losing weight, then at some point, I'll lose all the weight, and then what?  Most likely I'll stop doing what I'm supposed to do, because I've reached that goal.  But, if I focus on gaining health - well, that never ends.  It's a life-long pursuit.  And that means, I'll be working constantly on that.  No more yo-yoing!

On the front of the Habits of Health book, it says "The path to permanent weight control and optimal health".  I'm now well on my way down that path, and I've got the goal of optimal health in mind.  It makes me happy just to think about where I'll be in 2 months, in 6 months, in a year - or even 2 or 5 years.

I've learned in just a short time that it is possible to overcome cancer - completely.  And even to feel better than ever - I've taken that final step, and I feel amazing!

I just went through a box of clothes that I've kept stashed downstairs - these are my favorite clothes, but I haven't been able to wear any of them for years!  I got into every one of them.  My son took my picture in a few items...

Life is good, my friends!

-Kara

MONDAY MOTIVATION - Thank Heaven For Good People!

Yesterday was a difficult day for me - which hopefully explains why this post is a day late.  I've been helping my sister move, and we spent Sunday cleaning the old rental house.  We didn't finish, so we left all of our cleaning supplies there, and went back yesterday morning to do the rest.  Kris noticed that a huge box of her cleaning supplies was gone, and assumed that our husbands had loaded it onto the last moving truck the day before.  She found some supplies under the bathroom sink, and started to clean there.  I went downstairs, and vacuumed my nephew's room - the only room that wasn't cleaned out the day before.  After I finished, I went into the other room to get my carpet cleaning machine that I had left there over night.  It wasn't there.  I looked in the rest of the basement, and couldn't see it.  I went up stairs... no carpet cleaner.  I even went up into the attic room, but couldn't find it.  I made the search again, just to be sure, and then I told Kris that it was missing.  She couldn't believe it.  We started the search again, and as we went from room to room, we started noticing other missing items... her floor steamer, my Tupperware container (that I've had for 25 years), dirty rags, sponges, a box of garbage bags, etc.  We finally came to the conclusion that we had been robbed the night before.

We called the police, and they came.  While we waited for them, we started a list.  You can't believe what these guys took!  We went outside and looked through the 2 sheds, thinking perhaps this was a prank (because it was so random and bizarre), and that they just hid everything outside, and that's when we noticed that all of the boxes full of donations for our charity (that were left in the garage) were missing, along with a wheelchair.  What loser steals a wheelchair??!!

We went shopping to replace a few of the items that we needed to complete our cleaning, and as we looked through the cleaning supplies, more things came to mind that were missing.  One of the most bizarre things... Kris's garbage can.  It was FULL of garbage, and they emptied it out on top of the pile of things going to the dump, and took the can!!!  And the scissors... and the cooler with ice cold water bottles... and, and, and...

It was a depressing day.  It took us twice as long to clean, and we were mad for the whole day.  Who in the world breaks into a house to take the cleaning supplies??  I'm surprised they left the roll of toilet paper!

I thought about this all last night... how happy I am that I'm not a bad person like that.  How happy I am that I surround myself with good people that bring happiness to others.  How great it is that those I associate with would never act this way.  I guess that I've just spent so much time with good people who want to help others - the members of Lifting Hearts for example - that I'm shocked and dismayed when I encounter the opposite kind of person.  Thank heaven for good people!  And shame on those who aren't.

And speaking of cleaning... I'll give you TUESDAY'S TIP here too:
Become a member of Happy Chemo and receive TONS of discounts on products and services, including house cleaning!  Go HERE to see what's it's all about!

MONDAY MOTIVATION - Look Fear in the Face

So true...

MONDAY MOTIVATION - Thankfulness and Gratitude

This last week, I was making some homemade Thank You cards. I searched the internet for some quotes on Gratitude and Thankfulness. I came across some of the most wonderful quotes. I thought today, I'd share a few with you. As you read these, think of those who have helped you through your cancer journey - family, friends, doctors, nurses, etc.

"What we do for ourselves dies with us. What we do for others and the world remains and is immortal." -Albert Pine

"How far that little candle throws his beam! So shines a good deed in a weary world." -Shakespeare

"The measure of a person's life is the affect they have on others." -Steve Nash

"Unselfish and noble actions are the most radiant pages in the biography of souls." -David Thomas

"How wonderful that no one need wait a single moment to improve the world." -Anne Frank

And finally... the one that I chose to put on my cards:

"Every action in our lives touches on some chord that will vibrate in eternity." - Edwin Hubbel Chapin

**Just a little reminder to be full of gratitude for those who have helped you along the way - take a moment and let them know how you feel.

Have a great day, everyone!

-Kara

MONDAY MOTIVATION - Quotes

Thought I'd share some survivors quotes today...

"I explained to a friend what a TRAM flap procedure was; cutting a portion of my abdominal tissue and muscle and using it to reconstruct a new breast. Her reply? “So, when you get hungry, does your breast growl?” Haha!

"Paper gowns should be outlawed!"

"There is more to us than what is written on a chart or read in a test result."

"When I lost my hair, my lashes, and my eyebrows, it felt like I was being erased."

"Some days you fight totally for others' sake."

"Try to take on one worry at a time, and not obsess about the magnitude of your entire treatment. Yesterday is gone and tomorrow is yet to be. Today is more than enough for most of us to handle."

"I learned very early to look at what surgery, chemo and radiation was going to do FOR me instead of TO me. That made all the difference."

"Hope costs nothing to give, and is priceless to have."

"I have often thought of cancer as a schoolyard bully... he’s a bully with such a bad reputation that he no longer has to fight: just the mere thought of him could send people running. But all it takes is for a couple of people to stand up to the bully to diminish his reputation. That’s what a cancer success story does-it stares down the cancer bully. It shows that he can be beaten-and, believe me, he can!"

I know God won't give me anything I can't handle; I just wish He didn't trust me so much." --Mother Teresa

"With hope there is significant power."

These quotes came from THIS website. Have a great day!

MONDAY MOTIVATION - Setting and Achieving Goals

For awhile now, I've been wanting to reclaim my health, and even be more healthy than I was before my cancer diagnosis. The thing I personally need to work on is losing weight. If I can lose some weight, I know I'll feel better, and be much more healthy, in addition to reducing my chances of recurrence. I've taken a few baby steps in the last 2 years - I stopped drinking soda, and I cut my portion sizes down. I haven't lost any weigh, though.

Recently, at our support meeting, we learned about a doctor-approved weight loss plan - one that is low carb, low glycemic, high protein, and soy-based. I've decided to try this plan out. I think I can lose the weight, and in the process, learn how to change my habits to become a healthier person.

I started 5 days ago, and one of the things I have to do is drink a LOT of water. I am drinking 118 oz. of water every day - that's 15 cups! It's about 75 percent more water than I've ever tried to drink in one day. I decided that the only way I would be able to do this, is to make a goal. Goals are wonderful things, at least for me they are. I find that if I set a goal - especially if I have to check in with someone - I can usually achieve that goal, with some good hard work. I love this quote by Scott Reed: "This one step - choosing a goal and sticking to it - changes everything." It's true! By setting a goal, I've got a destination in mind - I keep moving - and once I've reached that goal, I feel so good about myself.

Whatever you feel you need to do to get your health back on track, make a plan, set some goals, and then work to achieve those goals.

And remember, whatever your goals are, it's the journey toward those goals that changes us. One of my favorite people, Spencer W. Kimball, said this: "Success is not measured in achievement of goals, but in the stress and strain of meeting those goals."

A PACKED POST - A Whole Week in One Day!

If you are like me, you have been taking it easy this past week. It's been nice having the kids home from school, seeing my college-age son more, Skyping with my missionary son in Mexico, enjoying the extra time with my husband, etc. It seems like the week in between Christmas and New Years is a family time. Because of that, I've been quiet here on the blog. I thought I'd just let you all enjoy the time with your families.

Here is a super quick update for the whole week:

MODAY MOTIVATION: "Every man should be born again on the first day of January. Start with a fresh page. Take up one hole more in the buckle if necessary, or let down one, according to circumstances; but on the first of January let every man gird himself once more, with his face to the front, and take no interest in the things that were and are past." ~Henry Ward Beecher

TUESDAY TIDINGS: I'll be posting the new 6 month calendar next Tuesday, so don't forget to visit and check it out. We've got great things in store for Lifting Hearts members!

WORDLESS WEDNESDAY: Here are some pictures from our Christmas party...




THURSDAY THOUGHTS: Just two more days in 2011! If this has been a hard year for you, look forward to 2012 - things will be better! If it's been a great year for you, look forward to 2012 - things will be even better! "Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man." ~Benjamin Franklin

FRIDAY FARE: Try these yummy hot drink recipes for your New Year's Eve party...

Mexican Hot Chocolate

Ingredients

• 1 quart milk
• 2 three-inch cinnamon sticks
• 10 ounces Ibarra, or other Mexican chocolate, finely chopped
• Whipped cream, for serving
• Pinch of ground cinnamon, for serving

Directions

1. Place milk and cinnamon sticks in a heavy medium saucepan. Bring just to a boil, reduce heat, and add chocolate. Let the mixture stand until chocolate melts, about 3 minutes. Whisk until combined.
2. Serve Mexican hot chocolate immediately, topped with a dollop of whipped cream and a pinch of ground cinnamon.

Warm Vanilla Cider

Ingredients

• 6 cups fresh apple cider
• 2 tablespoons packed dark-brown sugar
• 2 whole nutmeg seeds
• 1 vanilla bean (split and scraped)
• 6 ounces (3/4 cup) bourbon, if desired
• Whipped cream
• Honeyed walnuts
  

Directions

1. Combine apple cider, dark-brown sugar, nutmeg seeds, and vanilla bean in a medium saucepan. Gently simmer over medium-low heat for 15 minutes. Remove from heat, and add bourbon if desired. Remove and discard solids. Divide among 6 mugs or heatproof glasses, and top each with a dollop of whipped cream and a few honeyed walnuts.

SATURDAY STRENGTH: It's New Years Eve, and time to think about those resolutions! Yikes! One of the resolutions on most people's lists has something to do with getting in better shape. This year, be easy on yourself, and make just one goal - that way, you'll be more likely to stick to it. Here are a few ideas...

1. Drink 8 glasses of water every day. Increase the amount gradually.

2. Take a brisk walk every day. Walking is a great exercise!

3. Eat smaller amounts. Try using a smaller plate, and filling at least half of it with fresh veggies.

4. Do strength training 3 times each week.

5. Don't drink soda in 2012 (I've done this one for the last 2 years! I feel so much better!)

There are lots of different things you can do to look and feel better this coming year. Pick one, and go for it!

Have a great celebration tonight, and I'll see you in the New Year!

-Kara

"Glory to God in highest heaven,
Who unto man His Son hath given;
While angels sing with tender mirth,
A glad new year to all the earth.
~Martin Luther

MONDAY MOTIVATION - A Season of Service

This last week, I had the opportunity to help with a Christmas project - my son, Matthew, did his Eagle Scout project - which was providing Christmas for 70 kids. We gathered gifts for each child, and stuffed stockings. We provided clothing - either a coat, pajamas pants, or a winter outfit. And, of course, a book for each one. Our whole family participated. There were several friends and neighbors who helped as well, and I heard from many of them about how privileged they felt to be able to help those in need.

Stocking Stuffers

Wrapping gifts

Tons of presents!

Serving others, as I've said many times before, is something I feel is a necessary part of healing. Part of why I do these kinds of projects is to "give back" - because of the help I received during my cancer journey. Part of why I serve is to show my children how important it is.

During the holidays, it's easy to find ways to serve. Help out at a soup kitchen, gather clothing for the shelters, make small gifts for neighbors, give the gift of time to your children, and so on. There are all kinds of opportunities to serve.

I encourage your to take time to serve, and let that service help you heal. Have a wonderful holiday season!

-Kara

MONDAY MOTIVATION - An Unlikely Heroine

The holidays are in full swing - as you probably noticed by my lack of posting last week. I started out the week by helping my son with his Eagle Scout project... Christmas for 20 families. This completely consumed us - as anyone who tried to email or facebook me can tell you. Then, of course, Thanksgiving with family, and then Black Friday - which actually started at 10:00 on Thanksgiving day. I'm still not fully recovered from my 24 hours of no sleep. On Saturday, I was asked if I would be willing to accompany someone who wanted to sing at church the next day. Yikes!

This week will be just as busy, and as I sit here, at almost midnight, writing an email to my son, who is living in Mexico, I realize that this it's nice and quiet - everyone else is in bed - and I've got some time to think. I'm wondering what I want to write about on this blog for Monday's post. Looking back over the last week, I try to remember a time when I didn't feel rushed, and I think it has to be when I found the time to sit still and read an incredible book. The book my kids talked me into reading is from a genre the I don't usually read - Fantasy. However, it doesn't really matter what genre it's from if the story is well written, and grabs my attention. The book is called Mistborn, and I loved it. Why? Well, there was a bad guy - really bad. There was an unlikely heroine. There was magic. A good story always includes someone who overcomes something bad. I love a book that offers me lessons to be learned, and reinforces my belief that good guys come out on top!

I wonder why I like stories like this? Thinking about it, this kind of story sounds familiar to me - in terms of my own life...

The bad guy... CANCER (don't we know it!)
The unlikely heroine... ME (or you... any survivor, really)
The lessons learned... I'm strong enough to defeat the disease, I can do hard things
The magic... I've changed - I'm more empathetic, not as self-centered, and I've come to realize what is most important in my life.

Even though this last week was busy, it was time well spent with family, serving others. I hope you'll take some time this holiday season with your family. Take some time helping others. And take some time for yourself. After all - the heroine needs to relax a little, right?

MONDAY MOTIVATION - Happy Halloween!

Yes, I'm still alive! Wow... when I realized that I'd forgotten to update the blog for 4 days, I felt awful. But, life happens, and sometimes things don't go as planned. I'll try to be better about updating daily.

Today is Halloween - the start of fun holidays with family and friends. Three years ago, this was me on Halloween...



This was taken 2 weeks after my bi-lateral mastectomy. I looked (and felt) pretty awful. In fact, this is what I felt like...


(picture of my son, Michael)

I was getting ready to start chemo the next week, and didn't really feel like celebrating any kind of holiday, but my sweet friends invited us for a Halloween dinner, and so we went. I felt better for going.

I think spending time with family and friends during the holidays, especially when you need cheering up, is a great idea. Just because you are going through something that completely consumes you - like cancer - doesn't mean that you have to give up on being normal. So what if your chest just got cut off? Wrap some bandages around you, and go party like a mummy! So what if all your hair just fell out? Wrap a skull bandana around your head, throw on your leather jacket, borrow your neighbor's Harley, and go as part of a motorcycle gang! Make something good out of something bad. You'll feel better, and you'll make others happy as well.

Lucky for me, I'm not in the middle of treatments this year. I'm grateful that I can do normal things, like decorate my house with carved pumpkins, and answer the door to give out treats. I'm just happy to be alive! I hope that, even if you are in the middle of fighting the monster, you'll be able to focus on something else today. Enjoy being with your family... you can resume the fight tomorrow.

Go and have some good, old-fashioned Halloween fun tonight.

Happy Halloween, everyone!

-Kara

MONDAY MOTIVATION - Time Marches On - What Are You Doing With It?

This morning, I watched a special about Steve Jobs, the inventor of the Apple Computer, the iPod, the iPhone, and the iPad, among other things. There was a clip of him speaking at a commencement of a university, and he said:

"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life."

That thought really struck me - it applies to everyone. Our time is limited - none of us will live forever. I've always told my children to pursue their passions - that I'd rather have them working at a job they LOVE, even if the money isn't great, than to have them make tons of money doing something that makes them miserable. And if the LOVE part and the MONEY part comes together, that is something to be happy and proud of.

I've also taught them to spend some of their precious time in serving other people. Because, let's face it, there are SO many people who need help. And service, simply, enables you to feel joy.

A third thing I feel is important - don't waste your time wishing for things that don't matter. Rather, spend some time focusing on gratitude - being thankful for the opportunities you have to make your life something incredible.

Benjamin Franklin said: "Lost time is never found again."

These two ideas - that time is limited, and that time passes and we can't get it back - should make ambitious and careful people of us all. Ambition is eagerly desiring a goal we've set - and working constantly toward that goal. Being careful simply means that we don't waste our days, but we carefully and methodically spend our time.

Take an inventory of the goals you have, and the time you have to accomplish them, and make sure you are on track. Always be doing, achieving, and making something. Because, Steve Jobs is right - time is limited. As a cancer survivor, I know that it's smart to live my life to it's fullest, not waste my time with meaningless things, and spend time on whatever it is that makes my happiness complete. For me, that would be my family. What about you? What makes you happy?

Make your life count!

MONDAY MOTIVATION - Friends Along the Way

Guest Blog Post: I'm excited to share this guest post, written by my friend, and fellow Lifting Hearts Board member, Colette Harris. Enjoy...

"During my journey with breast cancer I have made many friends along the way. Little did I realize that a park near my home would become one of them. I remember the first couple of days after my diagnosis. I was stunned. I kept asking myself, “How could this happen to me? Where do I go from here?” With a heavy heart, I decided to take my troubles to the park. Tears flowed down my face and splashed to the ground. The sun-warmed walking path graciously absorbed them and accepted them as her own. As time passed, one lap around the park became two, then three. A gentle breeze eventually dried all of my tears and the song of a bird lifted my heart. My fear was replaced with peace, and somehow I knew that I would be okay.

I didn’t visit my park for many months after my bilateral mastectomy and treatments. My last four chemo treatments were rough. Neuropathy set in and walking was a struggle. My feet were numb and my legs felt limp. I could only walk a few steps without feeling like I would fall. The little fish named Dory in the movie Finding Nemo became my hero. Her motto was “Just keep swimming; just keep swimming.” I decided that my new motto would be “Just keep moving; just keep moving.” I was determined to do whatever it took to get my legs back under me. Family members helped steady me as I attempted to walk around the block. Even with their assistance, I could only walk to the end of the street before my legs gave out. I told them I was thinking of getting a cane. That way I could practice walking on my own without having to rely on them. My daughter had a brilliant idea. She mentioned that she wanted to get into better shape after having her first baby. She suggested that I push her baby in its stroller at the park while she ran. That way she would have someone to watch her baby and I would have something to lean on while I walked. It was a win – win situation for both of us.

I was excited to once again visit my old friend, Bonneville Park. Feeling the sun on my face, hearing the laughter of children playing while pushing my beautiful granddaughter in her stroller was very therapeutic. Each week was a new victory. I cheered when I could push the stroller one lap around the park without my legs giving out. In time, it was two laps, then three. My legs were getting stronger and I could walk further without feeling like I would fall.

After several weeks of pushing my granddaughter in her stroller, I tried to walk one lap around the park without any assistance. This time, it was tears of joy that streamed from my face and splashed to the ground. Once again, the sun-warmed walking path lovingly absorbed them and shared my private victory with me.

It has now been 2 ½ years since I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I still have neuropathy, but my legs are much stronger, thanks to Bonneville Park. Last week I cheered when I walked two miles around the park without my legs giving out. Hooray! I am trying to walk six days a week. By the end of September, I hope to be able to walk three miles so I can finally walk in a 5K in October for breast cancer awareness month. There is a Making Strides Against Breast Cancer Walk October, 8th. I hope to participate. (It would be awesome if our support group could form a team and walk with me!) Thank you Bonneville Park, you have been a true friend on my road to recovery.

Post Script: August 11, 2011 was a very special day for me. That was the day that so many of you awesome survivors and your families came to my park, Bonneville Park, for our Lifting Hearts picnic. Who would have guessed that a little over a year ago we were complete strangers and now you have become such dear friends. Thank you for sharing your journey with me. It has been so much fun interacting with you at our support group meetings every month. You are like sisters to me and I love each of you. Now as I walk around the park, my mind is flooded with many wonderful memories of our evening together. Thank you for being a part of my life. Thank you for helping me feel whole.

-Colette Harris
Survivor
Member of Lifting Hearts
Director of Programming (on the Board of Lifting Hearts)
Guest Blogger

MONDAY MOTIVATION - "I Cannot Live Without Books" (Thomas Jefferson)

I'm an avid reader. I love to read all kinds of books - fiction, non-fiction, biographies, religious texts, self improvement books, fairy tales... everything.

Why do books appeal to me so much? There are a few reasons:

1. Books are an escape from the difficulties of life - if even for just a little while.
2. Books put me into other people's shoes, and allow me to experience things they experience.
3. Books help me gain knowledge - just about the only thing I'll take with me when I leave this world.
4. Books help me see that no matter what hard thing I am dealing with, someone somewhere else is facing something even harder.

Books help me step away from being a breast cancer patient/survivor for a minute, and put me into someone else's shoes - something that really helps me cope.

So, let's step away from cancer for a minute, and step into some good books:

Here are some famous first lines from books - see if you can guess which books they are from. Perhaps one of these lines will lure you into a different world? (The answers will be at the bottom of the post.)

Classics:

1. "It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife."

2. "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair."

3. "Whether I shall turn out to be the hero of my own life, or whether that station will be held by anybody else, these pages must show."

4. "I had the story, bit by bit, from various people, and, as generally happens in such cases, each time it was a different story."

5. "In my younger and more vulnerable years my father gave me some advice that I've been turning over in my mind ever since."

6. "You better not never tell nobody but God."

7. "The cold passed reluctantly from the earth, and the retiring fogs revealed an army stretched out on the hills, resting. "

8. "When Mr Bilbo Baggins of Bag End announced that he would shortly be celebrating his eleventy-first birthday with a party of special magnificence, there was much talk and excitement in Hobbiton."

9. "Call me Ishmael."

10. "This is the story of what a Woman’s patience can endure, and what a Man’s resolution can achieve."


Modern novels...

1. "Mr and Mrs Dursley, of number four Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much."

2. "I became what I am today at the age of twelve, on a frigid overcast day in the winter of 1975."

3. "Who is John Gault?"

4. "Once upon a time there was a pair of pants."

5. "The year that Buttercup was born, the most beautiful woman in the world was a French scullery maid named Annette."

6. "There was a boy called Eustace Clarence Scrubb, and he almost deserved it."

7. "He began his new life standing up, surrounded by cold darkness and stale, dusty air."

8. "If you are interested in stories with happy endings, you would be better off reading some other book."

I've read almost all of these books, and I can tell you right now... if you immerse yourself in one of these works of literature, you'll forget your troubles for awhile.

"Some books leave us free and some books make us free." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

ANSWERS

1. Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austin
2. A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens
3. David Copperfield by Charles Dickens
4. Ethan Fromme by Edith Wharton
5. The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
6. The Color Purple by Alice Walker
7. The Red Badge of Courage by Stephen Crane
8. The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien
9. Moby Dick by Herman Melville
10. The Woman in White by Wilkie Collins

1. Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone by J.K. Rowling
2. The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini
3. Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand
4. The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants by Ann Brashares
5. The Princess Bride by William Goldman
6. The Voyage of the Dawn Treader by C.S. Lewis
7. The Maze Runner by James Dashner
8. A Series of Unfortunate Events - Book the First: The Bad Beginning by Lemony Snicket

MONDAY MOTIVATION - Looking At Trials Through Rose-Colored Glasses

"You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses."

The other day, my husband and I got into the car to go somewhere, and Rick put on his sunglasses. He said, "I love how these sunglasses just make everything look so much better." Rick showed me how the blinding sun is cut out, and the colors come alive.. everything is vibrant and beautiful.

Have you ever heard the phrase "Looking at life through rose-colored glasses"? I was thinking about that phrase the other day. Life is wonderful, but it can be hard. We all have trials to get through during our lives, and many of the trials are very difficult. There is a huge potential for us to want to give up - to lose hope. It's easy to lose hope if we are looking at our trials, and seeing only terrible things. But, if we thinking about putting on glasses that help us see a little bit better - that help us see things through the eyes of hope, rather than despair, it's my belief that we can feel better about the things we have to deal with.

Just like Rick putting on his sunglasses, and being able to better appreciate everything there is to see in this beautiful world, we can put on our "rose-colored" glasses, and see our trials for what they really are... not events that will make us miserable, but events that will help mold us into better people; that will help us have strength, patience, and understanding; that will make us better than we were before.

And that makes life beautiful and vibrant, don't you think?

"There are always flowers for those who want to see them." -Henri Matisse

MONDAY MOTIVATION - Back in the Groove

I realized after my chemo treatments were through, that I had absolutely NO muscles left in my body! Well, that's not strictly true, I'm sure, but I felt like I had no muscles. I had a really hard time feeling well enough to even walk, and I was sure I would never get back in the groove of exercising.

Before I was diagnosed, I loved lifting weights. At my strongest, I was lifting 3 times per week. I also loved walking. I would go early in the morning to my local cemetery, which is a really beautiful place, with walking paths. There, I would, at my best, walk 2-3 miles per day. I felt really good, and was getting even better.

I would have been happy to be able to walk just 1 mile per day after chemo, but everything seemed to hurt. I had heel spurs before being diagnosed with cancer, but they didn't bother me at all. But, after treatments, the heel spurs made walking so painful, I would just hobble along. The more I walked, the worse it got. I've even had heel spur surgery since my treatments ended, but it didn't help. In fact, if anything, my foot pain has doubled!

I decided last week that I would buy an elliptical machine - thinking that perhaps if I exercised on one of those, and my foot stayed on one place, I would be able to keep exercising. My husband was, of course, skeptical. I'm always looking for new and improved ways to exercise (most of them I drop when I don't see instant results!). So, I don't blame him for wondering if I'd stick to the elliptical. I found a $1500 machine for $350 - used - on KSL.COM, and bought it. When we finally got it downstairs to my workout room, I was super excited to start. I feel an obligation to prove to my husband (who doesn't believe this will last), that I'm going to do this!

Here is my new baby...

(Is that Kara, you ask? Well... no. But, it will be soon!)

(I straightened and cleaned my unfinished basement workout room - vacuuming, rearranging, dusting all the equipment. I borrowing my son's speakers, so I could listen to my iPod. I put a shelving unit in the room for all the free weights, music equipment, weight-lifting gloves, etc. It is AWESOME!!!)

Four days ago, I hopped on the elliptical for the first time. I plugged in my iPod, turned on the fan, and started... at the 1 minute mark, the (lack of) muscles in my legs were BURNING! OW! I stopped for a few seconds, and then started again. One more minute went by and I had to take another breather (GEEZ!). This went on until I thought I was going to die (at the 5 minute mark)! Yep - I walked 5 whole minutes. Unbelievable, right?! I've done that for the past four days, adding 5 more minutes for the last two days. This is TOUGH. But, I refuse to prove my husband right. And, boy, is he excited. He's so happy I'm actually using the machine, and that I'm going to start feeling stronger. So am I - I can tell this is going to take a long time to get back into shape, but I'm willing to put the 5 minutes per day in! Haha! Just kidding. Hopefully I'll be able to eventually walk on the machine for 45 minutes.

I'm telling you about this pathetic attempt to bounce back from chemo because I want you to know that, wherever you are in the whole cancer journey, and no matter how awful you feel, there will come a time when you will be happy to be able to work on getting back in the groove.

Good luck to all of you! I'll keep on moving!

-Kara